5 Ways to Find What You Actually Like (In This Season of Life)
There are times in life when everything just feels... fine. Not terrible. Not amazing. Just fine. Sometimes, “fine” can feel like a daze. You wake up, move through your day, do what needs to be done, but the joy and the sense of aliveness has gone missing.
If that’s where you are right now, you’re just in a season of life where your old passions might not fit, and your new ones haven’t introduced themselves yet. You don’t need to reinvent your whole life to feel good again. You just need to find one small spark that you can follow.
Here are five ways to connect with what you actually like in this season of your life:
1. Notice what you keep coming back to.
Start with patterns. Even when things feel flat, we’re still drawn to certain books, shows, activities, or people. What are you rewatching, rereading, saving, or gravitating toward?
Don’t overthink it. These are breadcrumbs, and if you follow them, they’ll often lead you back to something meaningful.
For me, one of those clues is my Peloton bike. It’s so much more than a workout. It’s music, laughter, movement, and sweat that shifts my mood and reminds me I’m alive. I always come back to it. Why? Because I have fun doing it, and I feel good about myself after.
2. Pay attention to what makes you feel capable.
Joy can come from contribution, from effectiveness, from the feeling of I did that. Lately, mowing the lawn has been unexpectedly fulfilling for me. It sounds simple and maybe even silly, but the visual transformation and the physical engagement give me a tangible sense of progress. It makes me feel grounded and useful.
Ask yourself: What’s one thing you do that leaves you feeling proud, even in a small way?
3. Let your body give you clues.
Our bodies know things long before our minds catch up. When was the last time you felt a sense of lightness or expansion? When did you feel tight, heavy, or closed off?
Years ago, when I was totally disconnected from my body, a therapist told me to start a yoga practice. I rolled my eyes. That practice, which I did in my living room following Yoga With Adriene on YouTube (check her out!) helped me feel again. I could feel myself, my intuition, and what felt right and what didn’t.
You don’t have to love yoga, but maybe there’s something else you can try that slows you down enough to listen to your body.
4. Revisit what you used to love without the pressure to love it again.
Go back to the things you used to enjoy just to see how you feel about them now. Consider childhood hobbies, past passions, and random side quests. Try them again and see what they have to say.
I returned to Legos, jigsaw puzzles, and painting-by-numbers. In doing so, I remembered how much I love working with my hands. It calms my mind and gives me something real to focus on.
Let your past joys be teachers. Even if the answer is, “Nope, not anymore,” that’s still a valuable piece of the puzzle.
5. Look for the small spark, not the grand plan
You don’t need to find your capital-P Passion or your grand Life Purpose right now. You just need the next right feeling, something that makes you feel a little more alive or a little curious.
Sometimes that’s reading a book you wouldn’t normally pick up. Sometimes it’s texting an old friend. Sometimes it’s letting yourself be bad at something new. The point is to move toward what feels good.
If you’ve been feeling flat, disconnected, or unsure of what lights you up these days, let this be your reminder: your new passions are waiting to be discovered.
You don’t have to overhaul your life or figure everything out at once. Follow what feels good. Let the clues guide you. Let your curiosity lead. Let yourself evolve into the person who loves new things.
If you need a little help getting started, try this ChatGPT prompt:
Act as a thinking partner who helps me identify what I actually enjoy in this season of my life. Here’s what I know: I feel stuck, disconnected, and unsure of what I like anymore. I’ve noticed a few things that feel a little better: [insert examples]. Help me reflect on what these might have in common, what they say about what I need right now, and give me 3 ideas to explore that align with this energy.
🎧 To explore this further, listen to Episode 101 of Better Day Start Today: 5 Ways to Find What You Actually Like (In This Season of Life)
